Wow, so it's been a little while. Sorry we fell off the face of the Earth for a while but it was for good reason. I'm just going to be honest with you all, Andy and I hit our first bump as newlyweds about a week ago. Not having a job has taken a toll on my self-esteem lately. Being jobless wasn't a big problem until after the wedding, when I didn't have anything to focus my energy on besides job hunting. When that's pretty much all there was for me to do in the day, so a lot of my focus went towards Andy and that wasn't good. I wasn't focusing on myself enough and I was starting to resent him for a lot of things, even though these things were in no way his fault. I resented the fact that he had a job, something to fill up his day, I resented the fact that I took on the burden of the tedious house work because it was all I could do to help out, I resented him for the weight I have gained, for the fact that no matter how hard I tried I wasn't getting any interviews. None of these things are his fault, but being unemployed has really taken it's toll on me. I was nit picking everything he did and said, trying to cause a fight because I was so angry with myself and the world. I didn't know any of this until one day last week when a major blow out occured.
Suddenly it all came spilling out, how I felt worthless, felt angry, and most of all how bitter I felt. It took a few days to really work through everything I was feeling with him but I am happy to report we are back on track and being disgusting newlyweds again. I'm working on the employment situation and our plan to move to Columbus is moving (pardon the pun) rather quickly, like we could be living there in two weeks quickly, but that's a post for another day. I'm also working on some goals for myself. Like the C25K program (anyone else put on the newlywed nine and want to start this with me?), eating healthier, and finding ways to use my crafty-ness. I'm getting along better and feeling a lot better about myself and I realize that I am so extremely lucky to have a husband who is so supportive and understanding.
Has anyone else had their first bump as newlyweds?
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4 weeks ago
I was there... I was let go right after I got engaged. It made me depressed and made B resent me since I wasn't working. I ended up getting a part time job just to get out of the house. Keep with it! You'll find something. And try to remember to take time to do things together and NOT talk about work or lack of work!
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